My body had been gearing up for labor a couple weeks earlier with days of prodromal labor. My goal was to have baby sometime during the Christmas break which meant I needed to make it past 37 weeks. By 36 weeks, I was already dilating which was no surprise. My body likes to get a lot of that out of the way before baby's arrival. By 37 weeks I was nearly half way there, so when I went in a day before my 38 week check-up, my midwife gave me the option of a "mercy induction". I was already 5cm dilated, 70% effaced and baby was still pretty high, but I felt like this was a good choice.
We arrived around 8am on Friday morning. I was so anxious to meet our little boy. My nurse got me all checked in and shortly after 9am my midwife broke my water and we were ahead of the game starting off at 6cm already. Someone asked if the fluid was clear and another replied yes, but there seemed to be something off in the conversation. I brushed that aside as I prepared for what lay ahead of me. Things were off to a slow start, so Ryan and I agreed that he could take a nap until I needed him later. He had been working a lot preparing for a wedding on New Years Eve, so in order for him to have the energy and attention for me when I needed him the most, I was okay with him snoozing.
Anyway, that first hour was pretty uneventful. Contractions were very irregular. I sat in the bed for a while, but I knew if I wanted to move things along I needed to get up and move around. This was my second VBAC and with my first, I had an epidural. I had such a bad experience with it that I was determined to not use it this time. As the contractions came at the last part of that hour, I was noticing that they felt very different. Very rarely did my whole belly feel tight like I was used to. It would get tight, but at the bottom of my belly would be a very sharp pain. Right in the area of my c-section scar. And to be honest, I never put two and two together. I figured, "Huh, this is different. I hope it goes away."
I had to use the bathroom, so I figured this was a good time to try something new like the birthing ball. Never used that before, so I wanted to give it a shot. When I used the bathroom, I had a gush of fluid and saw that it was very red. I thought it a bit strange that I would be bleeding that much. Again I really didn't think too much of it nor to even mention it to the nurse because if there were cause for concern, they would have said something to me. So I sat on the ball. Contractions continue, but I was not being monitored. The nurse comes to hook me back up, but she was not able to find baby's heartbeat because of my position on the ball. The contractions were beginning to intensify while on the ball along with the pain on the bottom of my belly, so I mentioned it to my nurse. She asked me to stand and BAM a huge contraction hit and the pain along my belly shot through me. I grabbed her shoulder and vocalized my way through that contraction which seemed to last for a very long time. I felt a slight panic. This didn't feel right. I really wasn't sure if I was going to make it through the whole labor. As we stood I couldn't take the pain and she couldn't get the baby on the monitor, so I crawled into the bed and sat again.
We found baby and the contractions regulated. The sharp pain would change. Sometimes I'd feel it only on the left side. Other times it would be all across the belly. I'm not sure what time it was, but by now Dana stayed with me the whole time. I called out to Ryan to be with me too, and he pulled himself out of his nap to support me. The contractions were now very intense. I felt very panicked and out of control. I groaned and tried to breathe through the contractions. We even tried a dose of Fentanyl, and Dana was telling me I was doing a good job, but I didn't feel it. Finally I said something to the effect that I can't take it anymore. And I couldn't. It felt like my belly was ripping in two. I was laying on my left side clinging to the rails of the bed as each contraction hit. Dana wanted to check me (Lord I hated to hear that) and as she did, she said I was about 8cm (dammit) and she couldn't feel baby. He had moved back up higher. This is where things get crazy and a bit chaotic. During that last check I cried out from the pain and Dana made the decision to rush me to the OR (she had been consulting with the on call OB from her office during that hour). Calmly, I believe she was telling me that we needed to get the baby out because they thought my c-section scar was opening. "YES! OK! Knock me out!! Please!" is all I could reply.
I hear the staff getting Ryan dressed for the OR and they rush me out. I was still clinging to the bed rails and the nurses kept trying to get me to keep my hands inside. And that was really hard, because I really needed something to grip onto!! Now, the OR is not very from from the L&D rooms, but when you are in pain, it seems like forever. However, those few seconds changed the game.
As soon as we hit the first set of doors to the OR that unstoppable (and I truly mean unstoppable) urge to push hit. Chaos. Chaos in my head, chaos in the room with two teams buzzing around me (the OR team and my labor team). When the pushing urge hit while laying on my left side, naturally I screamed, "I'm pushing! I have to push!" To which Dana replied (though I never heard her, my body was talking way louder than she was) "No don't push!!" I roared, I yelled, I screamed out, "Aahhhhhhh!!" I couldn't stop it. My body took over. At times I did hear her say, "Nicole, breath. Take a breath," and "Stop pushing." Later I learned that the cord was wrapped a couple times around his neck and she had to do a slight turn and flip through my legs to get him untangled. When she talked to me during pushing, there was a few second delay between my ears and my brain processing and reacting to her. I'm going to say (because memory is a bit fuzzy) with two hard and furious pushes and still clinging to the bed rails, our son Jacob Christopher was born. Jacob was perfect and very healthy. I held him to my chest for just a few seconds and he was given to my husband.
It'd be nice to say that was the end, but unfortunately I was bleeding. Heavily. They got the pitocen hooked up, but before starting it they needed to know where the bleeding was coming from. The OB internally checked my uterus feeling my incision to make sure it had not opened up. As excruciating painful as that was, it was necessary and thankfully my incision was intact. It was determined that the bleeding probably came from my placenta beginning to separate from the uterine wall. The pit was started and within the hour my bleeding was under control.
We returned to our labor room and I was able to have my hour with our son.
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